I'm supposed to be in my therapist's office right now. But, I got mixed up on the times. I thought my appointment was at noon. I don't know why because in my planner, I wrote down 1pm. If only I looked at my planner. I found a sitter for the kids from 11:30am-1:30pm. I can't get a hold of them by phone to see if they can keep my kids another hour. So, I cancelled my therapy appointment and came home to blog about it. This will be my therapy for today and the kids can keep playing.
About therapy--it's been going really well. I'm surprised, actually, at how much it helps. We talk a lot about how I have this blueprint in my head of how I want or think things should be and how my life just isn't working out like that. Oooh. Deep. The more I think about it, the more I realize how right he is. I had an idea of what it would be like to be a parent of a typically developing child. Now that I don't have a typically developing child I need to change my views of what it means to be a successful parent. This is really difficult to do. But, I'm trying and I think it is working. I feel a lot more confident and calm as a parent and I think Carl can see a difference, too. We attended a class on behavior issues put on by Caleb's preschool teacher. Having Carl hear other people tell him some of the strategies that I've been trying to tell him about really made a difference. I think it has helped him become more confident and calm as well. With Caleb, that is key. Calm. It's hard to be calm when his tantrums include grabbing his little sister by the neck or pulling my hair out clumps at a time. But, we've been doing better and we have seen Caleb make really good improvements. I'm proud of our family and what we've been able to accomplish so far. Really, I can only be optimistic about what the future holds for us.
I have no clever way to change the subject to my hair.
I have always been under the impression that my hair is blond. Sure, it's not as blond as it used to be but it is still blond.
Or, is it?
Carl told me yesterday that it wasn't blond...that it was light brown. The thought of having brown hair isn't displeasing to me in any way. I just was surprised, that's all. Do I need to stop thinking of myself as a blond and embrace the fact that I'm really a brunette?
What do you all think? Am I blond or brunette? I have been wondering whether or not to dye my hair again but every time I look at it in the mirror I love it (whatever color it is) so I can't bring myself to changing it just yet.
Monday, April 09, 2007
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Ah, the good old expectations vs. reality trap. I know it well. Thanks for the reminder.
ReplyDeleteI have middle ground hair too. My hair has been described as blond, brown and red. Yes, red. It all depends on how short it is, how much sun I've been getting, and how recently I washed it. You and I can't be categorized. We're free spirits. :)
I can see great improvements in Caleb and also in you. You are much more calm with him and don't seem as stressed.
ReplyDeleteAs for hair color I would say blond. It is the same way with David and Kurt.
I think of you as a dark blond - but maybe that's because anyone with lighter hair is categorized in my brain as blond. (Reality vs. perception again!) Would you go lighter or darker? I've been toying with the idea of going redder and lighter for the past couple of summers but have always chickened out.
ReplyDeleteMaren-If I'm going to take the time to dye my hair I like it to be dramatic. So, I usually go red or dark. I'm actually really happy with my hair color right now but I need to do "something" with myself and that is one of the cheapest things. I should probably just go down the street and get a pedicure.
ReplyDeleteI think you're blondish-brownish. How's that for decisive?
ReplyDeleteHey, I'll meet you for a pedicure. Let's celebrate a certain someone's birthday. Although this week is busy. . .maybe on Saturday? Is it a date?
You totally could've called me back to have me watch the kids!!
I'm gald the therapy is helping you. Parenting isn't what I thought it was going to be, but I wouldn't give it up for the world! I bet it feels good to have Carl on the same calming page:)
ReplyDeletedark blond, light brown...hmmm is there a difference?! I think you can call it whatever you want.
Sounds like I can be whatever I want!
ReplyDeleteCatherine, you're right. We're free spirits!
Wendy-Saturday sounds good if we can go in the morning. Fancy Nails across from Burger King has the most awesome massage chairs.
I would say you are either dark blond or light brown.
ReplyDeleteIt's better than what my hairdresser used to call my hair. "Dishwater Blond". Uck! Over the last few years it had become definitely brown. And now? I think it could be called "Cinnamon and Sugar" because I have white hairs popping in all over the place.
Sigh.
Oh, but I have some good news! You won the drawer papers! Maybe for your Birthday you'll get to drive to that IKEA? Email me your address and they're yours!
Woohoo! I won a prize! I'll email you right now.
ReplyDelete