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Thursday, April 27, 2006

Moving Tales

Guess what? The other members of my family have names and I'm going to use them. Sugar Daddy will now be referred to as Carl, the part of Frog will be played by Caleb and Big Apple will now be known as Eva (the Spanish pronounciation---Ava). I realize that the vast majority of people that read my blog are family members and close friends. So, I'm simplifying. Okay, now on to my tale.

This is a true story. Carl is a major pack rat. He does come by it honestly, though. He comes from a long line of hoarders. He has a hard time throwing things away. I'm starting to fear for this house. We've been married for almost 8 years and in that time we've moved 6 times. This has been good for me because it forces Carl to throw out some things out of sheer necessity. Now that we are finally in our own house, I worry that not having the every other year purge is going to make this house feel overrun. I shared my fears with him this morning and he blew me off saying he couldn't talk about it at the moment because he was feeling backed into a corner. Backed into a corner??? I merely suggested that we can throw out a travel coffee mug (hello? We're Mormons. We don't even drink coffee!) that we got from the little cafe where we ate after we got married. We've had that thing 8 years and haven't used it once.

Another example...Carl has more clothes than I do yet he wears the same thing every week. He does admit that he can get rid of some t-shirts now that he's a working man (like those free bank t-shirts that we got when we were undergrads over 10 years ago?) but most of his t-shirts need to be SAVED because of the memories. WHAT? He wants to pack away t-shirts in a box in the basement because they have sentimental value? Did they save his life? Are they magic? They're just t-shirts! I suggested cutting them up and making him a quilt if he wants to keep the "memories" alive so badly. I think he actually wants me to do that. Maybe I can get away with taking pictures of him in the shirts and making wallets and he can carry them around in his pocket everyday! I'm getting a good idea on how those Clean Sweep organizers feel when they have a particularly hard person to convince that they don't need to keep every little thing that they've ever owned.

Well, I have a long day of unpacking ahead of me but I'm not allowed to throw anything else out until Carl has an "inspection". I know at least half of the things he would never notice are gone but I'm not quite willing to push my luck on that yet.

11 comments:

  1. ......god has witnessed....your goodness.

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  2. Wow! I thought I was at the wrong webpage for a moment even though I've been eagerly anticipating your new blog look for too long! Great new look and congratulations on becoming a home owner (or at least, the bank owns a house and you get to pay them for 30 years).

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  3. Anonymous11:18 AM

    Men are such delicate flowers . . . but only sometimes. I'm amazed by some of the things I can say to my husband when I'm frustrated, and he takes them good-naturedly. A couple of months ago he was a total pill for an entire weekend, and we had many arguments and I was totally frustrated by Sunday night. When I told him that I had spent the whole weekend wanting to strangle him and dump his body in the desert (but I can't carry that much dead weight) he just laughed and it actually broke the tension.

    On the other hand . . . he uses that "backed into a corner" line often when I ask him a question that requires an immediate decision. Or when I want to talk about my feelings without him offering advice every ten seconds. Or when I ask him to pick a restaurant because I really don't care what I eat.

    We don't hoard coffee mugs, but we have software and software manuals that are three versions old. I finally convinced him that we could get rid of "Windows 95 for Dummies" and reclaim those two inches of shelf space.

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  4. OH awesome idea the quilt will be great! you can use old jeans or just jean material for the back. ya know a jeans and t-shirt quilt it will be soft and warm!!! you can do it just cut 8 by 8 squares and sew up together.. fun fun fun and quick too!
    ok i may be stupid... but why can't you drink coffee? sorry if that's a dumb question..
    i seem to hoard coffee mugs though. but i use them.. at least the pretty ones. i should get rid of the stupid ones.. EEEK i'm a pack rat too!

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  5. Allena,
    Here's a link to copy and paste from the church website that explains why we don't drink coffee. http://mormon.org/learn/0,8672,1301-1,00.html

    But, it basically goes along the whole your body is a temple line and we should be physically and spiritually strong. Unfortunately it doesn't limit ice cream and casserole consumption which is the downfall of many, many Mormons! ;)

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  6. I've long suspected it, but Carl is my Dad. Ok, not really-but I had to stop cleaning my parents' house because I got so tired of my Dad getting onto me for throwing things away without letting him look first. If the Clean Sweepers came to Dad's house, the stress might kill him. I'll have to read this to my mom so she can laugh.
    On the other hand, if you find a good pattern for that t-shirt quilt, I would be interested. I too have a box of t-shirts in the garage.

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  7. Anonymous4:23 PM

    At least 2 of the packrats in Carl's life have made some major changes. The reflooring project has started something! After the files are culled and the bathroom painted and the living room recarpeted, I think I'll clean the attic!!! That's the height of reform!

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  8. Janet--now all you have to do is quit asking Carl if he wants all that stuff because you know he'll say yes! I did appreciate those Christmas letters. It's amazing how you described the boys when they were little and how they still have a lot of the same characteristics today!

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  9. Anonymous1:14 PM

    I hope you're not ditching the nicknames because I thought Carl was a Sex God. I thought the nicknames were cool.

    We have a packrat problem too and it's magnified by the fact that we live in this dumpy tiny apartment. Can you at least negotiate to get rid of the broken computers?

    Catherine

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  10. I didn't even go there with the computers!!!! I figured I would start small with the things that invade my own personal space.

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  11. Oh, and I didn't change the nicknames because of the Sex God thing. I just got tired of having to go back through my posts and change their names because I would forget to use their nickname. Just simplifying...and I'm pretty confident I don't have too many whack jobs reading my blog. Maybe just one or two and they already know who we are. ;)

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